Review Date: May 25, 2010
Developer: This Is Pop
Publisher: Adult Swim
Platform: Browser
Genre: Time Management
Everyone needs to eat, even prisoners. In Death Row Diner, it's up to you to make sure that those prisoners get fed, doling out their daily portions of slop. But there's more to it than simply spooning out stew, as you'll also have to keep the warden happy and break up gang fights before they get too bad. The life of a death row lunch lady rarely gets boring.
Food To Die For
The game plays out like a somewhat simplified version of Diner Dash, with groups of prisoners lining up to be fed and seated. It starts off very simply, easing you into the experience, but the difficulty quickly ramps up as new elements are constantly introduced. There are two different gangs of prisoners, each of which wears a different color, and you'll have to make sure they aren't seated at the same table or else you'll have a riot on your hands.
Eventually you'll have several different choices of food to give prisoners. There are multiple colors of slop to choose from, and some prisoners will even request a hamburger or some fried chicken. If you don't give them what they want, seat them at the wrong table, or just let them wait too long, the prisoners will break out in a fight. And if you don't get there in time, well, let's just say that not everyone will be making it back from lunch.
Unlike Diner Dash, in Death Row Diner you don't have to worry about getting a specific high score in order to beat a level. All you need to do to progress is ensure that your shift ends with fewer than three deaths. You also don't have to worry about purchasing upgrades for your restaurant.
Things really start to pick around a third of the way into the game -- which consists of a total of 21 stages -- when the difficulty level ramps up quite a bit.
If Looks Could Kill
In addition to playing a lot like Diner Dash, Death Row Diner also looks quite a bit like it as well, with a nice cartoon visual style complete with large character sprites. Of course, because of the setting, Death Row Diner is a quite a bit darker. The cafeteria is depressing and grey, the inmates are all huge and hulking, and the lunch lady looks appropriately grumpy. Fights leave streaks of dark red blood on the floors and tables, which you'll have to clean up.
The graphics are a nice twist on the Diner Dash formula, though a little more variety would've been nice. You're constantly feeding the same prisoners the same food in the same cafeteria for the whole game. The game also features a booming, hip-hop inspired soundtrack that fits the setting well, though, like the visuals, can get a little repetitive after a while.
As you can probably guess from the title, Death Row Diner is a game that includes content that is intended for an older audience. In addition to all the blood and violence, there's also quite a bit of strong language to be found.
The Bottom Line
If you're a fan of restaurant management games like Diner Dash, then Death Row Diner won't offer much that you haven't already seen before. Aside from the setting and a few minor changes, it's a straight up time management game with no frills. But for a free browser-based game, it's surprisingly full featured and offers up a solid challenge and plenty of personality.